We can’t explore the topic of reclaiming ourselves without a discussion on reclaiming our mental health! This week, Laura & Sonya talk about the way our concept of mental health has changed over time, and how that changing picture has resulted in new strategies for nurturing ourselves.
They explore the concept of whole body mental health, moving beyond just brain or mind health to understanding the connection mental health has with both our physical and emotional body.
You’ll learn why we need to see the brain as just a part of our entire nervous system, and to honor the body as a deeply insightful source of information about our wellbeing.
Join us as we discuss:
- 12:38 How to define mental health and our relationship to it.
- 21:02 The ways that personal and intergenerational trauma can manifest not just as stories, but in our physiology.
- 40:42 Embracing our senses as a path to self-awareness.
- 44:27 Practices that can get us started on the road to reclaiming our mental health.
Resources mentioned in the show:
- Integration educator and author Dr. Dan Siegel https://drdansiegel.com/#
Learn more about Sonya & Laura:
—> Sonya Stattmann is the host & creator of Reclaiming Ourselves™. She is a TEDx & corporate speaker, and has been working with leaders around personal development for the last 22 years. She teaches workshops & offers small group programs around emotional intelligence, transformational & embodied leadership and energy management. You can find more about her here:
Website: https://www.sonyastattmann.com/
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sonyastattmann/
—> Laura Shook-Guzman, co-host of Reclaiming Ourselves, LMFT, and Somatic Psychotherapist for entrepreneurs has been a mental health professional for 23 years. She’s the founder of three businesses; the world’s first Wellness Coworking Community Soma Vida, the global community Women Who Cowork, and her own therapy practice, Conscious Ambition. You can find more about her here:
Website: http://www.laurashookguzman.com/
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/laurashookguzman/
What you can do next:
- For more episodes, opportunities and information on the hosts, visit http://reclaimingourselvespodcast.com/
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Thank you for being you. We are so honored to have you as a listener!
Transcript
for human beings.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Mental health is the ability to
Laura Shook-Guzman:connect deep with oneself and in a way that
Laura Shook-Guzman:helps us connect with others.
Laura Shook-Guzman:isn't that why we're here
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Sonya Stattmann:I think the connection, I just hear like a high level of mental health.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:And mental wellness is our ability to connect and respond.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:I think that's the other piece that you touched on is, is how are we responding?
Sonya Stattmann:To the stimulus around us, right?
Sonya Stattmann:How are
Sonya Stattmann:we responding to what happens on a daily basis?
Sonya Stattmann:are we present and able to respond in connection,
Sonya Stattmann:with what happens?
Sonya Stattmann:Are we shutting down?
Sonya Stattmann:Are we running away?
Sonya Stattmann:Are we fighting it?
Sonya Stattmann:Are we perceiving what happens?
Sonya Stattmann:Because we have trauma in our past, right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like how are we responding?
Sonya Stattmann:To that kind of environment, whatever environment we're
Sonya Stattmann:encountering at whatever moment.
Sonya Stattmann:If, you know, there is something deep inside of you that is yearning to be
Sonya Stattmann:seen, to be known and to have expression.
Sonya Stattmann:If there's something.
Sonya Stattmann:you need to reclaim and remember maybe it's your power
Sonya Stattmann:or your purpose, your gifts.
Sonya Stattmann:This is the podcast for you.
Sonya Stattmann:Welcome to reclaiming ourselves.
Sonya Stattmann:I'm your host, Sonya Stattmann And I'm honored to have
Sonya Stattmann:three amazing co-hosts Laura?
Sonya Stattmann:Shook-Guzman Belinda Haan And Emily Soccorsy here with me on
Sonya Stattmann:this journey to self discovery
Sonya Stattmann:every week, we're gonna help you unravel and
Sonya Stattmann:remember what it means to reclaim yourself to own who you are to
Sonya Stattmann:recognize your innate worth and greatness.
Sonya Stattmann:Now, this podcast is.
Sonya Stattmann:a deep dive into self-development healing and
Sonya Stattmann:empowerment.
Sonya Stattmann:So hold on.
Sonya Stattmann:Here We, go.
Sonya Stattmann:Hello, and welcome back to reclaiming ourselves.
Sonya Stattmann:I am so excited to be here today with my longtime.
Sonya Stattmann:Co-host Laura shook Guzman.
Sonya Stattmann:We're gonna dive into a topic that is definitely near and
Sonya Stattmann:dear to her heart and something.
Sonya Stattmann:I am also very passionate about as well today.
Sonya Stattmann:We really wanna talk about.
Sonya Stattmann:What it means to reclaim our mental health.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:what does that even mean?
Sonya Stattmann:our mental health Why do we need to reclaim it?
Sonya Stattmann:This is gonna be a really juicy podcast.
Sonya Stattmann:That covers kind of a lot in this arena.
Sonya Stattmann:And I think it's a really important topic right now.
Sonya Stattmann:What do you think Laura?
Laura Shook-Guzman:yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:yes, yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:honestly, I think a lot of people feel that they know what mental health is.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It's almost like such a general term wellness, wellbeing,
Laura Shook-Guzman:mental health, mental wellness.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We, we see these words, these terms, and people think, oh, I know what that is.
Laura Shook-Guzman:But then when you really break it down and you ask someone, well,
Laura Shook-Guzman:what does mental health mean to you?
Laura Shook-Guzman:Or how do you measure.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Your mental health.
Laura Shook-Guzman:How do you know you're in a, a place where it is healthy and well, and when is it
Laura Shook-Guzman:challenged and you feel, you know, feeling ill at ease, like how do you measure that?
Laura Shook-Guzman:So I think it's gonna be a really good conversation to kind of come
Laura Shook-Guzman:back to the basics of what it is and how does one go about reclaiming it?
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Sonya Stattmann:I love that.
Sonya Stattmann:And you know, there's like so many threads.
Sonya Stattmann:I wanna pull this one moment.
Sonya Stattmann:I could just feel like all these.
Sonya Stattmann:Okay.
Sonya Stattmann:Where do I start?
Sonya Stattmann:Where do I start?
Sonya Stattmann:I mean, I love this idea of defining the measurement.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:Like, what does that look like for each of us?
Sonya Stattmann:Cause I think a lot of us are riding on this kind of burnout, mental exhaustion.
Sonya Stattmann:Like our mental health is not great and yet that's our norm, right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like that's what we consider normal.
Sonya Stattmann:And so I think it's really gonna be really interesting to kind of
Sonya Stattmann:unpack where is the line between when we feel really mentally healthy.
Sonya Stattmann:And the other thing I think we've gotta unpack is is mental health just mental.
Sonya Stattmann:Like we talk about mental health, but I mean, you and I definitely
Sonya Stattmann:talk about how it is physical.
Sonya Stattmann:It's somatic, it's emotional, it's mental, it's spiritual, right?
Sonya Stattmann:It's like it encompasses all of us.
Sonya Stattmann:So why have we relegated it to mental health?
Laura Shook-Guzman:That's a great starting point.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It's like, why do we use this word?
Laura Shook-Guzman:I mean, I think it speaks a lot to the origins of our.
Laura Shook-Guzman:School of our field of study for psychology, that the study, you
Laura Shook-Guzman:know, of the self of the psyche of the human for so many years began
Laura Shook-Guzman:with the mind, the fascination.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Of the mind and seeing so much of what we could understand, because we
Laura Shook-Guzman:didn't have all of the scientific tools that we have now to measure what was
Laura Shook-Guzman:happening inside the brain in the body.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So it was like what we can gather from people's behavior, what we can gather from
Laura Shook-Guzman:what they're saying, what they, what we can gather about what they're dreaming.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so all of these ways in which the early students of psychology were
Laura Shook-Guzman:pulling information out of humans.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Like, they just really limited it to their understanding of the time, which
Laura Shook-Guzman:was so much during Freud's time, at least in all of, you know, all of the
Laura Shook-Guzman:people that, uh, we don't even name because you know, their contributions
Laura Shook-Guzman:aren't even fully understood.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So we have this white male fraud Freud uhoh that was a Freudian slip
Laura Shook-Guzman:in which they, they, they were creating so much focus on the mind.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and, you know one of his students, Carl Young was a lot um, more
Laura Shook-Guzman:interested in the body, but it was just difficult to move the focus there.
Laura Shook-Guzman:People were more worshiping worshiping the mind that still
Laura Shook-Guzman:actually persisted to this day.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and yet we have all of this evidence that shows the strong mind body connection.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And that when we say mind, it doesn't just mean this like brain up here in
Laura Shook-Guzman:our cognitive ability, but all of our.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Somatic cognitive emotional perception experience.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so you will see researchers like Dan Siegel from Los Angeles
Laura Shook-Guzman:at UCLA mindfulness Institute, use the word mind sight, and he's
Laura Shook-Guzman:starting to broaden that definition within the scientific community.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:But I struggle with this sometimes when I'm writing out I'm a mental
Laura Shook-Guzman:health professional, or I'm doing mental health for founders, I just
Laura Shook-Guzman:struggle with thinking that is.
Laura Shook-Guzman:A, an encompassing word like that is not enough because I'm working so much with
Laura Shook-Guzman:the entire human self and so much is happening in the mind and in the body.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And there's this beautiful bidirectional relationship.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes, yes, yes.
Sonya Stattmann:You know, it's so funny cuz I think about, you know, back in, oh God, I'm
Sonya Stattmann:gonna really date myself back in like 97.
Sonya Stattmann:Right?
Sonya Stattmann:I was in college.
Sonya Stattmann:I was majoring in psychology, super passionate about psychology, but
Sonya Stattmann:something really felt incomplete.
Sonya Stattmann:that's what I felt like.
Sonya Stattmann:I love studying psychology.
Sonya Stattmann:I love studying, you know, all the different sort of prior people, all the
Sonya Stattmann:science they had, you know, which was very all mind based, all mental based.
Sonya Stattmann:But I always felt like something was missing.
Sonya Stattmann:Something was quite not complete, which is why I ended up switching majors and then,
Sonya Stattmann:you know, moving into business, which was like a completely different direction.
Sonya Stattmann:But I think, yes, it still persists so much today that
Sonya Stattmann:we're still talking about it.
Sonya Stattmann:Explaining it and looking at things through the, this mental
Sonya Stattmann:lens, through this brain lens, brain chemistry lens, right?
Sonya Stattmann:I think a lot of people define mental health as relating to brain chemistry.
Sonya Stattmann:And I don't think that we've broadened enough yet.
Sonya Stattmann:At least not on a.
Sonya Stattmann:A mass view that really, we can't talk about mental health without talking
Sonya Stattmann:about the mind body connection and mindfulness and our physical body
Sonya Stattmann:and our emotional body and all of these kind of pieces that really
Sonya Stattmann:affect and impact our mental health.
Laura Shook-Guzman:yeah, absolutely.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Because yeah, we sort of, you know, thought that we were progressing when we
Laura Shook-Guzman:went from thinking of any kind of mental illness, mental disease as a personal
Laura Shook-Guzman:problem, like in the past, it was like, well, this person has got an issue.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Something's wrong with them.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So then we were moving.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Narrative to understand, oh, there is a chemical difference
Laura Shook-Guzman:in this person's brain.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Oh, there's biological components.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So it's not a personal character flaw or weakness within this person, but there's
Laura Shook-Guzman:this biology that makes this vulnerable.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And we felt like that was very inclusive and we were, you know, really
Laura Shook-Guzman:getting somewhere with that narrative.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then what it did though, is it landed here in this isolated brain,
Laura Shook-Guzman:you know, the brain for some reason.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Chemical imbalances, and we don't really understand why.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then if you just take these other medications that will influence your
Laura Shook-Guzman:brain, then that's what we're gonna do.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We're gonna put some bandaid on those symptoms that are
Laura Shook-Guzman:occurring because of an imbalance.
Laura Shook-Guzman:That's such a top down, deductive way of thinking, trying to look at the symptom
Laura Shook-Guzman:and trace it all the way back, what I'm really interested in and am so grateful
Laura Shook-Guzman:that during my time, as a therapist, which to date myself has been for the past 25
Laura Shook-Guzman:years, that I've been in this field, is there more and more people are looking
Laura Shook-Guzman:at the bottom up what's happening at the.
Laura Shook-Guzman:What's happening that's impacting is whether it's an internal experience
Laura Shook-Guzman:inside that person's body or an external experience to which they're responding to.
Laura Shook-Guzman:There's a whole bunch of neurochemical, biological reactivity that occurs.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So we're not existing in a vacuum.
Laura Shook-Guzman:The brain doesn't sit there on a pedestal with nothing happening
Laura Shook-Guzman:to it and giving all the orders.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It is receptive.
Laura Shook-Guzman:To what is happening in all of the neurochemicals that are happening
Laura Shook-Guzman:on the neurotransmitters, they will shift and change depending on the
Laura Shook-Guzman:system, giving it orders, the nervous system, our central nervous system,
Laura Shook-Guzman:which goes all down our spine and throughout the body, like, so they say
Laura Shook-Guzman:our brain is not just up in our head.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It goes into our spinal column.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so there's so much now understanding that our mental health is a bottom
Laura Shook-Guzman:up approach to health and wellness.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So that's why that mental.
Laura Shook-Guzman:is problematic because it is really a mind, body health and understanding
Laura Shook-Guzman:that when information is taken in a body has the nerves and the senses,
Laura Shook-Guzman:then it develops a response that then it will have a chemical reaction to, or
Laura Shook-Guzman:it'll send a message up to the brain.
Laura Shook-Guzman:That's like, this is dangerous or this is safe, or this is, you know, too much.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And we know that we have all the biological components that
Laura Shook-Guzman:don't preserve our happiness, but preserve our site safety.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So that means your body is gonna do certain things that don't really
Laura Shook-Guzman:doesn't really make sense for the happiest, healthier, healthiest
Laura Shook-Guzman:brain out there, but it keeps that
Laura Shook-Guzman:person alive.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So there's a lot to unpack there and a lot of threads, but I think that
Laura Shook-Guzman:what I wanna name as the field is
Laura Shook-Guzman:shifting for me, my experience of it, based on what I was
Laura Shook-Guzman:learning in grad school.
Laura Shook-Guzman:In the early two thousands,
Laura Shook-Guzman:what we were learning, there was very much based in the
Laura Shook-Guzman:cognitions and in the behaviors.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And if we could change people's thoughts and we could change their behavior, then
Laura Shook-Guzman:we felt that we could shift the mental
Laura Shook-Guzman:health.
Laura Shook-Guzman:what I have come to understand is that the state of the nervous system
Laura Shook-Guzman:is what tells the story of what those cognitive thoughts are and of.
Laura Shook-Guzman:the behavior is.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so the language of the body is just such an important foundation for me of
Laura Shook-Guzman:helping myself and my clients establish
Laura Shook-Guzman:mental wellness, mind, body health.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes, yes, yes.
Sonya Stattmann:Okay.
Sonya Stattmann:So then to kind of bring it back to the original question in A simple way,
Sonya Stattmann:how would you define mental health?
Laura Shook-Guzman:A simple waste on you.
Laura Shook-Guzman:You ask me
Laura Shook-Guzman:I, and I'll be transparent with the listeners.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Like right now, you know, I wanna root down.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So to find my source and my answer, I wanna root down into
Laura Shook-Guzman:my feet.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I wanna pull back my shoulders.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I wanna take a deep breath and just ask myself, you know, what
Laura Shook-Guzman:is my sense of mental health
Laura Shook-Guzman:and wellness, right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:For me, it's about integration.
Laura Shook-Guzman:it's about a mind
Laura Shook-Guzman:and a body that is in interdependence with one
Laura Shook-Guzman:another it's bidirectional communication is going both
Laura Shook-Guzman:ways and there is an integration and a resonance between all that
Laura Shook-Guzman:information.
Sonya Stattmann:Mmm.
Laura Shook-Guzman:that means that even when something
Laura Shook-Guzman:dangerous and threatening comes
Laura Shook-Guzman:into the system, it has.
Laura Shook-Guzman:This United integrated way in which it can perceive
Laura Shook-Guzman:what's happening and then be able to Mount a response, right?
Laura Shook-Guzman:Is this something that is life threatening and happening right now?
Laura Shook-Guzman:And everything knows what to do, whereas is
Laura Shook-Guzman:this safe and I can go into deeper connection with myself and I can
Laura Shook-Guzman:have healthy social engagement.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and therefore I can be a human that's both inside of
Laura Shook-Guzman:myself and capable of this interrelationship, this connection.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And really that is for human beings.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Mental health is the ability to
Laura Shook-Guzman:connect deep with oneself and in a way that
Laura Shook-Guzman:helps us connect with others.
Laura Shook-Guzman:isn't that why we're here
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Sonya Stattmann:I think the connection, I just hear like a high level of mental health.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:And mental wellness is our ability to connect and respond.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:I think that's the other piece that you touched on is, is how are we responding?
Sonya Stattmann:To the stimulus around us, right?
Sonya Stattmann:How are
Sonya Stattmann:we responding to what happens on a daily basis?
Sonya Stattmann:You know, are we present and able to respond in connection,
Sonya Stattmann:with what happens?
Sonya Stattmann:Are we shutting down?
Sonya Stattmann:Are we running away?
Sonya Stattmann:Are we fighting it?
Sonya Stattmann:Are we perceiving what happens?
Sonya Stattmann:Because we have trauma in our past, right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like how are we responding?
Sonya Stattmann:To that kind of environment, whatever environment we're
Sonya Stattmann:encountering at whatever moment.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:I mean, and when I look at that myself, you know, a lot of times
Sonya Stattmann:I've felt pretty mentally healthy.
Sonya Stattmann:Right?
Sonya Stattmann:I don't, I don't know if I ever would ever say I have problems with my mental health.
Sonya Stattmann:And yet I definitely have times of meltdown.
Sonya Stattmann:I have times where I can't respond to the stimulus.
Sonya Stattmann:I feel so overwhelmed.
Sonya Stattmann:I shut down.
Sonya Stattmann:I hide, I hide into my Netflix.
Sonya Stattmann:So, you know, I think this is why this is such an important topic because we are.
Sonya Stattmann:All navigating our mental health, especially in today's environment.
Sonya Stattmann:I mean, even our children who are faced with so much more uncertainty,
Sonya Stattmann:so much more disconnection, so much more electronics, right.
Sonya Stattmann:They are also constantly dealing with mental health issues and challenges.
Sonya Stattmann:And so this is such a broader topic than We used to think of it in the past.
Sonya Stattmann:It's such an important topic
Sonya Stattmann:now.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:absolutely.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And there's so many things that I'm thinking of is I'm
Laura Shook-Guzman:hearing you actually name.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Symptoms.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So here I am naming mental health as an integration.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So when you start to experience overwhelm insomnia, depression,
Laura Shook-Guzman:anxiety, all of those different
Laura Shook-Guzman:behavioral
Laura Shook-Guzman:and cognitive and sensory sets of symptoms are signals
Laura Shook-Guzman:from your mind.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Letting you know, that that integration is
Laura Shook-Guzman:not occurring.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Something is happening.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And those are just giving you that
Laura Shook-Guzman:information.
Laura Shook-Guzman:A system that is feeling
Laura Shook-Guzman:the emotional experience is sensing through the body, able to hold
Laura Shook-Guzman:space, turn that sensation into, oh, that's me feeling tired or that's me
Laura Shook-Guzman:grieving a loss of this loved one.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I'm able to allow myself to feel, and I trust myself to feel
Laura Shook-Guzman:we're naming things.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We're feeling it to heal it, all of this.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We know, even as scientifically backed up that an organism needs to
Laura Shook-Guzman:do this, we need to let everything in and feel it and process it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:When we're doing that, we're staying integrated and the system is operating.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We can still get stressed out.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We can still have a fearful moment and the body's going to amount that
Laura Shook-Guzman:defense or respond, but it doesn't get stuck there when we're able to
Laura Shook-Guzman:keep allowing the information in and, and trusting ourselves to be with it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:What occurs for a lot of individuals is a fear of letting the full experience
Laura Shook-Guzman:in
Laura Shook-Guzman:because there's a lot of intensity to being alive.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I was saying
Sonya Stattmann:so much now more than ever.
Laura Shook-Guzman:so much intensity with being alive
Laura Shook-Guzman:and we learn from early age to.
Laura Shook-Guzman:deny those feelings.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I, we think about babies.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Now we tell them, which is just such a horrible message that, oh,
Laura Shook-Guzman:you know, we just let them cry it out because they're just gonna
Laura Shook-Guzman:eventually learn that guess what?
Laura Shook-Guzman:No one's coming.
Laura Shook-Guzman:That's a wonderful message.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so what we're actually teaching, so babies are great at telling
Laura Shook-Guzman:you that life is intense and they're not always comfortable.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and then we come in and give them food or give them a nice
Laura Shook-Guzman:rub or a bath or change a diaper.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then they get soothed.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So they fully experience the intensity
Laura Shook-Guzman:and then they ask for help.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And if those needs are met, then they keep going and
Laura Shook-Guzman:growing.
Laura Shook-Guzman:But we do live in a culture and in a greater society in which a lot
Laura Shook-Guzman:of those needs start not being met.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And we learn this kind of maladaptive.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Of being with intensity.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so we begin to shut it out and numb it out don't feel.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And that suppression of emotion is exhausting
Laura Shook-Guzman:for a system,
Laura Shook-Guzman:which means it's not able to keep processing and integrating as it.
Sonya Stattmann:That's right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:so what's really interesting is we have this system, the
Laura Shook-Guzman:human body that is miraculous and does so
Laura Shook-Guzman:many things.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And yet we treat our mental health, meaning these symptoms that are just alarm
Laura Shook-Guzman:bells saying, oh, something's going on?
Laura Shook-Guzman:we don't have enough safety, our needs.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Aren't getting met.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We need more space for this.
Laura Shook-Guzman:These are all very normal responses to abnormal levels of stress and
Laura Shook-Guzman:our body in mind just signals.
Laura Shook-Guzman:, but we have a lot of
Laura Shook-Guzman:We have a lot of societal and cultural stigma around not being able to name those
Laura Shook-Guzman:vulnerabilities, not being able to feel
Laura Shook-Guzman:right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I'm talking a lot about the individual body, but I will say that as a systems
Laura Shook-Guzman:therapist, I'm constantly thinking, not just like what this person is
Laura Shook-Guzman:doing and thinking about their feelings and their body and their trauma,
Laura Shook-Guzman:but what is the message being sent?
Laura Shook-Guzman:the outer systems, the family, the institutions, the larger country, the
Laura Shook-Guzman:larger world of the human citizenship.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So we are influenced constantly by what is okay or not okay to do and feel.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then we have our own individual challenges with feeling
Laura Shook-Guzman:the intensity of being alive
Laura Shook-Guzman:inside our bodies.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Sonya Stattmann:it's all interrelated, we can't split and compartmentalize the systems.
Sonya Stattmann:We can't say this individual, you know, just needs to get over it and be stronger.
Sonya Stattmann:And yet there's all these really broken systems.
Sonya Stattmann:I feel to be mentally healthy.
Sonya Stattmann:We actually have to go completely against the grain.
Sonya Stattmann:right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like
Laura Shook-Guzman:There's a lot of reprogramming or like dismantling
Laura Shook-Guzman:systems that actually bring.
Laura Shook-Guzman:into that separateness, the disconnecting, and then this is beautiful work.
Laura Shook-Guzman:That's coming out recently where they're showing evidence that this
Laura Shook-Guzman:legacy trauma legacy burdens or what's, you know trauma that's passed down,
Laura Shook-Guzman:intergenerational trauma, the epigenetics, it's not just a memory or a story
Laura Shook-Guzman:that's passed down from the family, one generation to the next there's a.
Laura Shook-Guzman:passing on, felt experience and a passing that on through the gene pool, in
Laura Shook-Guzman:which certain people are less resilient because they have had ancestor after
Laura Shook-Guzman:ancestor, after ancestor going through
Laura Shook-Guzman:a culture that continues to harm and wound.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so we know that there's a lot to pay attention to,
Laura Shook-Guzman:and we have this tendency to be like,
Laura Shook-Guzman:what's wrong with that person?
Laura Shook-Guzman:Why can't they keep it together?
Laura Shook-Guzman:What's going on
Sonya Stattmann:And even ourselves, right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like, you know, when you were talking earlier about what
Sonya Stattmann:mental health is or looks like.
Sonya Stattmann:I started to think, does anyone ever experience that all the
Sonya Stattmann:time?
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:Is there anyone who is like fully resilient?
Sonya Stattmann:You know, isn't completely falling apart.
Sonya Stattmann:Isn't experiencing overwhelm, isn't shutting down, right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like.
Sonya Stattmann:Is it even reasonable to think that you can get to a place where
Sonya Stattmann:you're in constant connection or constant integration?
Sonya Stattmann:Because I think there's so many people that, you know, constantly
Sonya Stattmann:beat themselves up for not being strong enough for not being more
Sonya Stattmann:capable for getting overwhelmed.
Sonya Stattmann:And yet, I think we have to talk about kind of the humanity of it, right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like what is realistic in terms of our connection, integration and mental health,
Sonya Stattmann:you know, is it always, no matter how healthy we are gonna be an in and an out,
Sonya Stattmann:uh, response and an, an unresponsiveness, like, what do you think about
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:If I can, get all my clients to move from the inner dialogue of what's wrong with
Laura Shook-Guzman:me to what is
Laura Shook-Guzman:happening to me right now, what's happening.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Cuz my body is giving me
Laura Shook-Guzman:signals.
Laura Shook-Guzman:My mind is giving me
Laura Shook-Guzman:signals.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Depression
Laura Shook-Guzman:is telling me some things.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Suppressed.
Laura Shook-Guzman:There's something that I'm holding something that's exhausting me something
Laura Shook-Guzman:I'm not feeling or able to move through.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Anxiety tells me that there's something too big for me to hold it's spilling
Laura Shook-Guzman:over the edges and I don't know what to
Laura Shook-Guzman:do with it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:But these are
Laura Shook-Guzman:natural.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Like you said, kind of ebbs and flows.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Sometimes life is gonna give you something that's really heavy and you don't wanna
Laura Shook-Guzman:feel.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And other times it's gonna flood you with all the feelings you can't help, but feel.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And knowing the ability to ask oneself what's happening to me
Laura Shook-Guzman:and learning, not to judge those symptoms, but when there's
Laura Shook-Guzman:insomnia it's oh, my system
Laura Shook-Guzman:is not
Laura Shook-Guzman:safe to sleep.
Sonya Stattmann:Mmm.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:Sleep is very vulnerable.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:So what's happening with me that there's a perceived.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:Now that doesn't necessarily mean there is a threat.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:It could be that I've heard layoffs are coming.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:I've heard about the re recession, you know, the credit card
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:interest rates are going up.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:And so there is a real threat that there's something happening in that way.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:But the body in you are not thinking like the body's
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:just like, yeah, your heart rate went up when you read that article.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:And then I can't go to sleep because we won't
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:be.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:Right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:So I guess I really wish that people would think of mental health as learning the
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:language of the body and of the mind, and to be able to better decipher your needs.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:Yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:I love that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:I just wanted to like frame that right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:Learning the language of our body, mind emotions.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:Right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:All the sort of pieces of ourselves.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:Yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:And, and what was the last thing you said?
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:Cause I really love
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:Yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:So being able to learn the language
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:of our mind,
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:our
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:body, our emotions, and be able to meet
Laura Shook-Guzman:
Speaker:those needs.
Sonya Stattmann:meet our needs.
Sonya Stattmann:Not everyone else's needs just our needs.
Sonya Stattmann:I think that alone puts a lot of people in a more, you know, in a framework of a
Sonya Stattmann:more mentally unhealthy existence, Right,
Sonya Stattmann:Like how many of us are burnt out or depleted because we're
Sonya Stattmann:So busy meeting everyone else's needs that we're not meeting our.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And we do live in a culture.
Laura Shook-Guzman:That will push back a lot on this, because I mean, I feel like this is the
Laura Shook-Guzman:majority of my sessions with my clients as they they're like, okay, I get that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:But then I go to work and my boss tells this, or I, you know, I have
Laura Shook-Guzman:to do this for school or I have to do this to fundraise, you know?
Laura Shook-Guzman:So there's a lot of like, I have to do this.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Like the world is not gonna stop.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I get that, that you're still operating with pressures and expectations,
Laura Shook-Guzman:but the more that you start to learn, it's your own in inner dialog.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and how you start to relate to yourself that you have full control over.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So who, yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:You're not gonna change your, your boss or this or
Laura Shook-Guzman:that, that we can let
Laura Shook-Guzman:that go.
Laura Shook-Guzman:What if on the way to that meeting, when your anxiety is out the roof
Laura Shook-Guzman:and you didn't sleep well that night, instead of berating yourself,
Laura Shook-Guzman:what the hell's wrong with me?
Laura Shook-Guzman:I've got this important presentation.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I'm just gonna freak out again, or I'm too tired, all that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Then you can just braid yourself all the way to.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Or you could take a couple deep breaths in
Laura Shook-Guzman:the car and you could say, so what's
Laura Shook-Guzman:happening.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I have a lot of
Laura Shook-Guzman:move, a lot of energy moving through my body right
Laura Shook-Guzman:now, but I also feel really
Laura Shook-Guzman:tired.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so what are a couple of things I could do?
Laura Shook-Guzman:One, I could get more oxygen to my brain.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So all the way to work, I could just do some deep breathing
Laura Shook-Guzman:to like bring more
Laura Shook-Guzman:oxygen
Laura Shook-Guzman:because I'm tired and I'm anxious.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So guess what?
Laura Shook-Guzman:I'm gonna get more oxygen to my.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Which is gonna help me feel more alert.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I'm also going to have my heart rate slow down because
Laura Shook-Guzman:that's what deep breathing will do.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Every time you exhale really, really long, your heart rate slows.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then your body says, oh my heart rate down.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So there's no threat here.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So see the difference of berating yourself.
Laura Shook-Guzman:What the hell's wrong with me?
Laura Shook-Guzman:Why am I acting this way again?
Laura Shook-Guzman:How am I gonna ever get myself
Laura Shook-Guzman:together to.
Laura Shook-Guzman:What's happening with me Right?
Laura Shook-Guzman:now, read the signs and then bring some tools.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Sonya Stattmann:And you know, it's so funny cuz I feel Like this has been my week, right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like you know, we go in and out of these places and even, you know,
Sonya Stattmann:being aware, even having lots of tools, we don't always even recognize
Sonya Stattmann:for a few moments that we're in something and we need to pull a tool.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:And I feel like, you know, for me, I sort of have this.
Sonya Stattmann:really challenging relationship with time.
Sonya Stattmann:And when I feel start to feel pressure of time deadlines,
Sonya Stattmann:there's so much to get done.
Sonya Stattmann:And I'm, I'm kind of seeing a looming deadline coming at me.
Sonya Stattmann:I perceive this great thread and I can, I can get into this space where, you know,
Sonya Stattmann:I'm distressed about the time, right?
Sonya Stattmann:it's not, there's like, it's, it's, I'm triggered.
Sonya Stattmann:And my central nervous system is
Sonya Stattmann:high.
Sonya Stattmann:And my, my heartbeat and I can't breathe and there's all this stuff happening And
Sonya Stattmann:the perception is I just have no time.
Sonya Stattmann:I'm trapped.
Sonya Stattmann:There's no time.
Sonya Stattmann:I'm never gonna get it done.
Sonya Stattmann:And I've been playing with this this week because I've been feeling some of that.
Sonya Stattmann:And, you know, and then I notice, okay, if I can just get back into my body, Right.
Sonya Stattmann:If I can just, you know, have a few moments of breathing.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:And then all of a sudden it's so interesting.
Sonya Stattmann:It's like a sliding door moment.
Sonya Stattmann:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:You know, it's like all of a sudden my perception shifts and I'm
Sonya Stattmann:like, oh, I can just not do these.
Sonya Stattmann:Things, they're not really that important or, oh, I can easily fit this in here.
Sonya Stattmann:Right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like it's like, my perception is so different and I've been going in and out
Sonya Stattmann:of this place, like all week.
Sonya Stattmann:and so I can really
Sonya Stattmann:feel.
Sonya Stattmann:If I didn't have these tools and these practices, and if I'd never
Sonya Stattmann:tried them before, you know, I would just stay in this altered state
Sonya Stattmann:of, you know, this like, you know, sympathetic, nervous system going crazy.
Sonya Stattmann:And you know, it really, it really is that simple.
Sonya Stattmann:It really can just be some simple things to kind of shift.
Sonya Stattmann:That place so that we're more in our body that we're breathing deeply and that we,
Sonya Stattmann:we kind of trigger that parasympathetic system so that we can, feel more at ease.
Sonya Stattmann:We can see things from a different viewpoint.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I love that you name that, that it is a simple shift and yet not an easy one
Laura Shook-Guzman:to make immediately.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I think a lot of people put a lot of expectation of like, I, well, I just can't
Laura Shook-Guzman:do that and I should be able to do it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And a lot of my clients who have complex PTSD,
Laura Shook-Guzman:so this is layered trauma.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It's gonna be a different
Laura Shook-Guzman:experience for them.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We're gonna learn.
Laura Shook-Guzman:some basic grounding and presenting in the beginning, just to kind
Laura Shook-Guzman:of help them keep remembering.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It's like a new neural pathway.
Laura Shook-Guzman:There's the pathway that just runs away.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And it's like, everything is a, is a threat to like helping that person learn.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Oh, actually that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Safe and I'm here.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Right?
Laura Shook-Guzman:So I just want anybody that's listening, any listener that's thinking.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:That works for people.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Not like me to remember that at any stage
Laura Shook-Guzman:of where you are.
Laura Shook-Guzman:If you've been patterned to have a very strong survival response that
Laura Shook-Guzman:kept you safe for many, many years,
Laura Shook-Guzman:that we wanna befriend that response, not criticize
Laura Shook-Guzman:it, give it a lot of love for keeping you alive and.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and start to introduce a new way for you
Laura Shook-Guzman:to keep coming back to what's happening to me right now,
Laura Shook-Guzman:so that I can start to shift that
Laura Shook-Guzman:connection in those neural pathways.
Laura Shook-Guzman:There's a really beautiful expression from Dan Siegel again, who said
Laura Shook-Guzman:what fires together, wires together.
Laura Shook-Guzman:so that's the
Laura Shook-Guzman:neuroplasticity.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Now you've had some wiring in there that's been running on automatic,
Laura Shook-Guzman:but with the therapeutic work, especially the body based.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So I'm a big proponent.
Laura Shook-Guzman:If you're doing trauma work, find yourself a body based professional,
Laura Shook-Guzman:Somatic psychotherapy there's a lot of different branches, but that's
Laura Shook-Guzman:your overall arching umbrella that you're looking for and learning
Laura Shook-Guzman:how to come into a different way of And just to full circle this all
Laura Shook-Guzman:the way to our theme of reclaiming
Laura Shook-Guzman:ourselves.
Sonya Stattmann:Mm-hmm
Laura Shook-Guzman:I would say that's the core of the work for anyone,
Laura Shook-Guzman:whether it's someone with complex
Laura Shook-Guzman:PTSD or someone who's just started to struggle with
Laura Shook-Guzman:some depression or insomnia or overwhelm
Laura Shook-Guzman:is what we're doing is
Laura Shook-Guzman:learning to ask what's happening to
Laura Shook-Guzman:me
Laura Shook-Guzman:and return.
Laura Shook-Guzman:to the present moment, return
Laura Shook-Guzman:to self over and over and over again, we learn different ways to do that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:There's different tools, different ways, but we're wiring the new connection.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We are firing all of those
Laura Shook-Guzman:awareness, those perceptions together, so that there
Laura Shook-Guzman:is These new connections.
Laura Shook-Guzman:so I just really feel like this message is so important for those out there
Laura Shook-Guzman:that are thinking, I just struggle.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I struggle with my mental health and it's just always gonna be the case.
Laura Shook-Guzman:The more extreme the symptoms,
Laura Shook-Guzman:the more challenging it is to find these, this center, because basically those
Laura Shook-Guzman:symptoms are just showing you the extreme of that disconnect and, those traumas,
Laura Shook-Guzman:and yet returning.
Laura Shook-Guzman:to your self energy returning to your most integrated
Laura Shook-Guzman:self is where that healing occurs.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I've never met anyone in the thousands of therapy sessions that I've done,
Laura Shook-Guzman:who doesn't have a self energy.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It's
Sonya Stattmann:And what does that look like, Laura?
Sonya Stattmann:Like, you know, what does that mean?
Sonya Stattmann:Because I, I do think this is at the core of what we're
Sonya Stattmann:talking about on this podcast.
Sonya Stattmann:And in this episode, right.
Sonya Stattmann:Is, you know, we're talking about reclaiming ourselves, we're
Sonya Stattmann:talking about reclaiming the self.
Sonya Stattmann:So, what does the self in there.
Sonya Stattmann:look like?
Sonya Stattmann:How do we have reference points or recognize, or remember, self energy.
Sonya Stattmann:I mean, that right there is a really good podcast, you know, episode, topic,
Sonya Stattmann:I think like what is self energy?
Laura Shook-Guzman:exactly right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It sounds good, but what is it?
Laura Shook-Guzman:So for me, I have the ability to feel
Laura Shook-Guzman:self energy better than I can probably articulate it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I used to worry about that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I used to think that I wasn't learning something like I better
Laura Shook-Guzman:take another training on self energy or self work or parts work.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Cause I, I need to know how to teach
Laura Shook-Guzman:this,
Laura Shook-Guzman:but the more that I've done, the more work I've done is.
Laura Shook-Guzman:The self is an energy that is very
Laura Shook-Guzman:much a
Laura Shook-Guzman:sense of presence.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Qualities that come from my clients when they're accessing self are
Laura Shook-Guzman:a sense of curiosity towards what's happening with them.
Laura Shook-Guzman:A sense of centeredness,
Laura Shook-Guzman:a sense of compassion.
Sonya Stattmann:Hmm.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and I feel it in my body
Laura Shook-Guzman:when they start to go there, I can feel it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I stay in my self energy as much as I can when I'm working with
Laura Shook-Guzman:someone who's trying to track that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So I'm in that energy, trying to resonate with that self inside of.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and I will track their body.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so they are, maybe their eyes are closed when people, when I ask
Laura Shook-Guzman:them to connect, you know, can you find that part inside of you where
Laura Shook-Guzman:there's a
Laura Shook-Guzman:sense of curiosity?
Laura Shook-Guzman:That might be a question, or can you find sense where there's a sense of
Laura Shook-Guzman:calm, then people will often close their eyes and they start to
Laura Shook-Guzman:notice what their what's coming up and I'll notice their shoulders.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Relax.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I'll notice them sit back in.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Or straighten up their spine lengthens.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So our physical body has this lengthening
Laura Shook-Guzman:stabilizing when it's in self,
Laura Shook-Guzman:which is good news, cuz you can actually use posture too.
Laura Shook-Guzman:You can lengthen the spine to find
Laura Shook-Guzman:that sense.
Laura Shook-Guzman:kind of drops down into.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So you notice that gravity can drop into your sit bones, like warmth in the belly.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So there's all of these somatic sensations that come with
Laura Shook-Guzman:self energy.
Laura Shook-Guzman:A lot of people will experience that when they're meditating.
Laura Shook-Guzman:They'll notice it in yoga class when they're moving between poses.
Laura Shook-Guzman:They'll notice it during Tai Chi, cuz that energy they source to
Laura Shook-Guzman:as they move their limb,
Laura Shook-Guzman:so.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Eastern traditions
Laura Shook-Guzman:have wonderful practices for connecting
Laura Shook-Guzman:that self energy.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And we all were born with it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We all have it
Laura Shook-Guzman:yet through like the ifs and the somatic trauma
Laura Shook-Guzman:lens.
Laura Shook-Guzman:You understand that
Laura Shook-Guzman:things start to
Laura Shook-Guzman:break apart.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Parts of you begin to try to protect vulnerabilities.
Laura Shook-Guzman:so there's wounding that occurs.
Laura Shook-Guzman:The self can sit and hold that wounding, but we don't yet quite
Laura Shook-Guzman:often trust the intensity of life.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So we think something bad is happening.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so these protector parts come out right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:To try to keep everything safe.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So when clients come into my office, I am not always.
Laura Shook-Guzman:getting them to that self energy at the very first, because they
Laura Shook-Guzman:have to develop trust with me and then trust with themselves.
Laura Shook-Guzman:But eventually we're able to find it more and more, and it becomes a
Laura Shook-Guzman:resource for them to be able to come back to that place when that
Laura Shook-Guzman:integration isn't happening, when they're dysregulated and these
Laura Shook-Guzman:symptoms are getting bigger and bigger,
Laura Shook-Guzman:it's a place for them
Laura Shook-Guzman:to remember their way back.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I
Sonya Stattmann:And you know it when you get it right?
Sonya Stattmann:Like you, when it happens, it it's like there's Uh, remembering,
Sonya Stattmann:uh, a knowing,
Sonya Stattmann:yeah.
Sonya Stattmann:When you kind of tap back in and, and it's amazing how long
Sonya Stattmann:we can live outside of it.
Sonya Stattmann:Like, you know, I think some people think, oh, I'm always with myself.
Sonya Stattmann:You know, I always am connected to myself energy, but , you know, it's amazing
Sonya Stattmann:how many years we can live disconnected.
Sonya Stattmann:And then when we reconnect, it's like, wow, I didn't even know.
Sonya Stattmann:You know, I was thinking the other day about when I first had that
Sonya Stattmann:realization, which was in college and I, this woman, I swear my instructor
Sonya Stattmann:totally saved my life at that time.
Sonya Stattmann:And I happened to like pop into a PE class.
Sonya Stattmann:I just needed an extra PE class and it was called stress reduction through dance.
Sonya Stattmann:And she basically taught the language of somatics.
Sonya Stattmann:And, you know, at first I was kind of like this is weird, you know,
Laura Shook-Guzman:right, because you weren't used to learning about the body
Laura Shook-Guzman:that way and dance through that way.
Sonya Stattmann:Nom.
Sonya Stattmann:And I mean, it was, it was a lot of play, which was not anywhere in my,
Sonya Stattmann:you know, being at that time, you know, my twenties, I mean, I drank a lot.
Sonya Stattmann:I partied a lot.
Sonya Stattmann:I worked a lot, you know, this was like a whole
Sonya Stattmann:different reality.
Sonya Stattmann:And when it dropped
Sonya Stattmann:in, when I finally actually felt a connection to the self in one of.
Sonya Stattmann:Classes.
Sonya Stattmann:I remember just sitting there and just bawling.
Sonya Stattmann:Like I was just in the corner bawling and like I had the realization
Sonya Stattmann:that for my entire life, as far back as I could remember, I was
Sonya Stattmann:not sitting in that self energy.
Sonya Stattmann:I was disconnected from my myself to such an extreme.
Sonya Stattmann:In that moment, I felt myself for the first time that I could really
Sonya Stattmann:recollect, you know, really have a, a cognitive awareness around.
Sonya Stattmann:And that moment totally changed the trajectory of my life.
Sonya Stattmann:And, and so you, when you get it, when you feel it, you know, it
Sonya Stattmann:it's something that is familiar.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I love that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:You said that it is familiar
Laura Shook-Guzman:and I do.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I see a dawning in my client's eyes, like a recognition.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Sometimes there's a cautiousness, like, is that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and, you know, a fear like, oh, it's gonna go away, but you always know it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And the more that you spend time
Laura Shook-Guzman:connecting to it, you just, you cultivate it and you make that connection stronger.
Sonya Stattmann:Yeah,
Laura Shook-Guzman:But we do live in a
Laura Shook-Guzman:culture that doesn't teach us about being in the.
Sonya Stattmann:mm-hmm.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And even our understanding of self, like
Laura Shook-Guzman:you said, is often intellectual.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Like I know I have self awareness.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I know what I'm thinking.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I know what I'm feeling, but it's a whole nother layer to drop into what
Laura Shook-Guzman:you're really sensing and feeling.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And we are sensory creature.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I mean, we are designed to learn through our senses and they are rich.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And if we lose one, the other ones become strong.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We are such sensory beings.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And yet we live around and in a lot of
Laura Shook-Guzman:disconnected spaces and containers.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So something that comes to mind is as we're having this conversation.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And so some of my clients will ask, well then how do I cultivate that?
Laura Shook-Guzman:You know, outside of the therapy session.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I know I have named that a lot of the, you know, Eastern
Laura Shook-Guzman:medicine traditions are great.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yoga and meditation, Tai Chi Chiko dance therapy, but also a simple
Laura Shook-Guzman:one that people often overlook is simply going out into nature
Sonya Stattmann:Mm.
Laura Shook-Guzman:because we are vibrational and nature stays on a
Laura Shook-Guzman:really beautiful vibrational frequency.
Laura Shook-Guzman:so we're not just going out to enjoy the beauty of it, the aesthetics of
Laura Shook-Guzman:it, which is awesome.
Laura Shook-Guzman:But there's
Laura Shook-Guzman:literal vibrational resonance.
Laura Shook-Guzman:When you are in a forest of trees that you start to feel what's coming from
Laura Shook-Guzman:the trees, what's coming from the leaves that's coming from the roots and all
Laura Shook-Guzman:the organisms around, I think people just really underestimate the power
Laura Shook-Guzman:of nature
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Reconnect.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So I'm a huge fan of forest bathing and in Texas it's Cedar brush bathing
Laura Shook-Guzman:but it even works even works in Cedar and
Laura Shook-Guzman:dance, like you said.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then another one that I really love is sound, sound, bowls,
Laura Shook-Guzman:music that moves
Laura Shook-Guzman:you again.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Beautiful.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Vibrational.
Laura Shook-Guzman:massages.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I mean, you're just basically like giving your self energy a nice dose of
Laura Shook-Guzman:beautiful resonances,
Laura Shook-Guzman:right?
Laura Shook-Guzman:So I'd just like to remind people it's not as complicated as they might think
Laura Shook-Guzman:to just start to get in touch with that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then of course the more trauma you have be very compassionate because you're
Laura Shook-Guzman:gonna have to befriend a lot of these.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Protective coping mechanisms, if you will, or protector parts in order to actually
Laura Shook-Guzman:get to more and more of the self energy.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And that's just because those are all little external boundaries
Laura Shook-Guzman:that have been built up to protect the wounded parts inside of you.
Sonya Stattmann:Yeah.
Sonya Stattmann:Oh, look, I feel like we could talk forever.
Sonya Stattmann:Like there's, there's so many pieces I'd like to pull.
Sonya Stattmann:There's So, many, you know, deep and really powerful messages here.
Sonya Stattmann:And, and I guess, you know, before we wrap up, I really, I kind of wanna look at,
Sonya Stattmann:or talk about some simple ways that we can start to reclaim our mental health.
Sonya Stattmann:So.
Sonya Stattmann:Reclaiming our reconnection to ourselves, our connection to the world,
Sonya Stattmann:like, all these listeners who are out there who may be thinking, oh yeah.
Sonya Stattmann:I could definitely use some support in this area.
Sonya Stattmann:And of course, highly recommend seeing Laura, you know, if you need a
Sonya Stattmann:psychotherapist or the many, many number of amazing people who are out there
Sonya Stattmann:supporting it, but even just as some, some simple steps, you know, Is it as easy as
Sonya Stattmann:just starting to go out into nature, you know, do we start to reclaim our feelings?
Sonya Stattmann:Like what are some kind of simple steps that we can take to start off with
Sonya Stattmann:to start to reclaim our mental health and, and shift what we're experiencing?
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Well, I think, you know, definitely the, the different activities that I
Laura Shook-Guzman:mentioned, I hope that everyone realizes that those can be very inclusive.
Laura Shook-Guzman:, those are very much, you can accommodate yourself in some level, even if it's
Laura Shook-Guzman:like you can't get down into nature.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It works to.
Laura Shook-Guzman:look at beautiful images of nature as well.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Like that one is a, a little bit, it's not as much the vibrational, but it's
Laura Shook-Guzman:the the resonance with that visual.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Right.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So all of those activities.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then I also think that, simple question, if you can shift the question
Laura Shook-Guzman:in your mind, what's wrong with me to what's happening to me, what's happening.
Laura Shook-Guzman:To me, meaning what's happening right now in my environment.
Laura Shook-Guzman:What's happening inside of me and listening for all those little signals.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I'm sad.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I'm depressed today.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We don't have to blame or criticize depression.
Laura Shook-Guzman:We just get that as information.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So that shift, that's a mindset shift that can be really powerful.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It's like what's happening with me.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then we move into soothing that like, well,
Laura Shook-Guzman:Over stimulated.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So I need to like turn off all the sounds and just take care of
Laura Shook-Guzman:myself for a minute, or I need to do that deep breathing, or I need to
Laura Shook-Guzman:listen to music or go out in nature
Laura Shook-Guzman:I think all those activities like come after this question.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So this question to return to self stop judging,
Laura Shook-Guzman:criticizing, questioning yourself and why you're feeling what you're feeling.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and simply ask what is happening to me, what am I experiencing then?
Laura Shook-Guzman:You know, the things that need to happen.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Right.
Sonya Stattmann:Yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So, yeah, I think that question is really, really important.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And then another little expression that we say in therapy a lot is name
Laura Shook-Guzman:it to tame it, feel it, to heal it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So, if you can name what's happening,
Laura Shook-Guzman:then it deescalates the activation just saying it to yourself or someone else.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So what's happening to me.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Then you name it that Tams it, let yourself feel it.
Laura Shook-Guzman:so it moves through.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Then you get to
Laura Shook-Guzman:stay in a more integrated state and your mental health has
Laura Shook-Guzman:much more of a wider window.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Bigger capacity to take in the stress of the world and still
Laura Shook-Guzman:be regulating.
Sonya Stattmann:Yes.
Sonya Stattmann:And, and I have no doubt.
Sonya Stattmann:We're gonna unpack more
Laura Shook-Guzman:Yes.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It's a big topic.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And we did say this to everyone, like to unpack something as big as mental
Laura Shook-Guzman:health, and there are so many yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Little threads that we could have gone off on, but I hope that that what came today.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Really breaking it down to something as simple as reorienting, the way
Laura Shook-Guzman:you view mental health, this is an integration you can move towards.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And if you're dysregulated and having symptoms, that's a signal simple as that.
Laura Shook-Guzman:It's just telling you so.
Laura Shook-Guzman:and then you can hopefully take action to shift what's in your environment.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Maybe it tells you that you shouldn't be in a relationship anymore, or you need
Laura Shook-Guzman:to be in a deeper connection or you need to be at that job or not at that job.
Laura Shook-Guzman:I mean, there's tons of things that once we start listening, we then can
Laura Shook-Guzman:have clarity about what actions to take.
Sonya Stattmann:Yeah.
Sonya Stattmann:And, and I just wanna add to that too, because you know,
Sonya Stattmann:listening is the first step.
Sonya Stattmann:If you just listen, if you just wanna practice one thing, practice the listening
Sonya Stattmann:or practice exactly like what Laura said, turning the what's wrong with me.
Sonya Stattmann:Question into what's happening.
Sonya Stattmann:Just the listening that in and of itself has so much impact.
Sonya Stattmann:That you don't even need to worry about the next step, which is taking action
Sonya Stattmann:or fixing it or changing something or leaving your job or leaving your partner
Sonya Stattmann:or, you know, whatever else is there.
Sonya Stattmann:Just the listening has a huge impact and you can just start
Sonya Stattmann:there.
Sonya Stattmann:Yeah.
Laura Shook-Guzman:just start there.
Laura Shook-Guzman:Mm.
Sonya Stattmann:Yeah, I love that.
Sonya Stattmann:All right.
Sonya Stattmann:Well, thank you Laura, for joining me today.
Sonya Stattmann:This is so powerful and amazing.
Sonya Stattmann:And thank you listeners.
Sonya Stattmann:And we will see you next week.
Laura Shook-Guzman:well, thanks for joining us today.
Laura Shook-Guzman:And I hope you enjoyed the show.
Laura Shook-Guzman:If you wanna learn more about this topic, head over to conscious ambition.com,
Laura Shook-Guzman:you can sign up for my email list.
Laura Shook-Guzman:So you never miss an episode, have a great day, and we'll see you next time.
